


I Will Never Forget

by ashes_at_midnight



Series: Love is Never Wise [5]
Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Episode tie-in, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-01
Updated: 2012-07-01
Packaged: 2017-11-08 22:58:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/448485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashes_at_midnight/pseuds/ashes_at_midnight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When the day is over the only thing we have left are our memories.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Will Never Forget

 

Their words resonate through my mind as I take the lift down to my apartment. _We swallow this day, as though it had never happened.  Twenty-four hours from the moment the demon first attacked you, we take it back._

Is it the right thing to do? I think so…

I’m no use to her like this, a man, I’m no use to anyone.

I have been useless before, as a human I was a drunk and a scoundrel, more interested in loose women and whiskey then being responsible. Then again, during those mind-numbing decades I spent wandering the sewers. It wasn’t until Whistler found me that I began to see the light again, a purpose. _Her._

Being useless doesn’t sit so well with me anymore.

So I asked them to swallow the day…take back the one thing in this world that I wanted. It was all for her… Buffy. I gave up my human life, so she could live for a few more years. But I would do it a thousand times again if it meant that she would be safe.

My heart was breaking. The funny thing is… once they take this day back my heart will be dead again. It’s ironic really.

The elevator ground to a noisy halt. _I really need to oil the hinges…._ I open the cage doors and walk into the apartment. Buffy is pacing around the kitchen. Her arms are folded across her chest, she looks worried. She glances up when she see’s it’s me hurries over. She wraps her arms around my waist and hugs me, burying her head against my chest. “Angel! Where have you been? I’ve been so worried,” she sniffs.

“I…”

She seems to sense my mood and pulls back. “What is it?” she asks flatly. There was no way I was getting out of this one.

“I went to the Oracles,” I told her softly.

“The Oracles? Why?”

“I asked them to turn me back. Back into a vampire…”

The look on her face mirrors the horror and pain on my own face. “No! Angel! No… why would you do that?” she asks me frantically.

“I almost died today Buffy! I almost died and you almost died trying to protect me! I’m no use to you as a human,” I practically shout, my chest heaving with each breath.

“So you’re just going to give it up! After everything we’ve shared this past 24 hours! You’re just going to throw it all away!” she stops and I see the tears running down her cheeks. “Do I mean so little to you?” she whispers, her voice so soft I can barely hear her.

My heart breaks. The last thing I have ever wanted to do was cause her pain. “Buffy… you know that’s not true! You mean more to me then my own life! Don’t you see? I would give up all the happiness in the world if it would make you safe! If I’m human how can I do that?”

“I’m the slayer! I don’t need protection!” she snaps at me.

I take a step towards her and put my hands gently on her shoulders. “Buffy: The Slayer might not need protecting, but Buffy: The Woman. I think she does occasionally.”

She looks away, but I can still see the tears as they run down her cheeks. She is sobbing as if her heart literally could break.

“So what’s going to happen now?” she asks.

I swallow nervously. “I asked them to take back the day. None of this will happen. They will leave me with the memory so that I can prevent it from happening again…”

“So that’s it…. I won’t remember any of this.”

“No… you will,” I say simply.

“What,” she asks confused, “You just…”

“They didn’t want you to remember, but I convinced them to let you keep the memories as well. This was not easy for me Buffy; I did this to keep you safe.” I take a deep breath and steady myself. “But I couldn’t do that to you. To take these memories from you… it wasn’t right for me to be able to remember this perfect day if you couldn’t.”

She’s looking at me wide-eyed. “I’ll still remember?”

I nod silently. She sniffs and buries her head against my chest again. “I… thank you, thank you for letting me remember.”

I glance up at the clock then. It’s time. There is a flash of light and suddenly we are both in my office. My skin is cool, my heart still. I can smell her blood and hear the sound of her beating heart, I shudder and shake my head, my nostrils twitch and I realize I’m hungry.

I glance up and find Buffy staring at me, there are tears in her eyes and I know she is remembering too.

“Buffy…” I start to say.

She shakes her head frantically. “Don’t Angel!" 

At that moment the Morah demon comes crashing through the window, sending shattered glass everywhere. I quickly grab the sword on my desk and lunge towards the demon, embedding it into the stone in the middle of the demon forehead. There is a flash from the stone and the demon crumples to the floor. Dead.

I glance up at Buffy then. Unsmiling. It’s done. It’s finished.

Now it’s time to forget.

 


End file.
